Shichida Methodology and parenting

Have been slow in updating this blog recently as much of my energy was spent on reading up on the Shichida's concept in child upbringing and making some home practices tools.

Here are some approaches which I've picked up regarding cultivating an environment friendly for right brain development. I feel that these are great tips to guide my parenting journey.

1. Accept the child as she is. Do not enter into a battle with the child as that will give rise to negativity (negative energy) and stress for both of parent and child. This shuts down the right brain.

Acceptance can be demonstrated by:
a) Listening to her
I'm guilty of not listening to Zhirui enough. We tend to forget this becos as parents, we always have 1001 things (more often, instructions) to tell our children. Zhirui's ex-nanny (JH tz) is a wonderful listener to Zhirui's then babbling. She would spend time sitting down with her on the couch and chat with her. She would ask her questions and listen to her answers and views, and comment. Amazingly, she said that Zhirui does understands her. A common saying goes, "Life mirrors what you do." If I refuse to listen to Zhirui, Zhirui will refuse to listen to me.     

b) Respecting her
Instead of rejecting her requests or wants straight, can try putting it across this way, "Mummy understands that you wish to... .... Mummy will let you ... ... when ... ..."

c) Believing in her.
When you truly believe in your child, you do not compare her with her peers and give up on her. Refrain from showing your disappointment when she does not meet expectations. Keeping encouraging her and reaffirm that she is really great! (Becos she really is!!)

After accepting the child as she is, teach her the proper so that she may slowly change her behavior.

Just remember a simple principle: Love opens up the mind, mind opens up the brain. Parental love is more important than anything in unveiling every child's potential. But love has to be conveyed in the right way. Loving without education will spoil the child.

2) Practise deep breathing before the home practices. When doing this, left brain waves switches to right brain waves, hence activating the right brain.

3) Apologize to the child for implanting negative tots.

4) Practise 8 seconds hugging, i.e. to hug your child for 8 seconds. This 'conveys' love to your child better. :)

Something worth pondering:
"Most mothers think that they love their children enough but most children think that their mothers don't love them enough."
The reasons I think, is probably because (1) mothers' love are not effectively conveyed to their children, or (2) mothers are loving their children in ways that their children do not accept, or (3) simply mothers do not shower enough love.

Hopefully I'm not the third kind of mother.. ;)